Detour... Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect $200.00

When I look back I knew that this day was coming.  In fact I knew what was wrong two or three weeks ago, but pretended it would go away on it's own. Then this past week things became increasing worse. I had to face the facts.  I had a Stricture.

In my situation, a stricture is the narrowing of the esophagus where it connects to the small intestine. Due to this a large portion of the food I ate, no matter how small or how well I chewed it, got stuck and came back up. Edie and I had gone out to dinner one night and after two bites of food, I was a mess and dinner was done. Heck, by the end I was struggling with soft foods like yogurt. I could ignore the situation all I wanted to but the stricture was not going to get any better on it's own, in fact it would most likely only get worse.

So yesterday started out with the alarm clock going off at 4:00 am. Followed by the two plus hour drive down to the Mayo Clinic. I arrived for my first appointment at 7:00 am and didn't leave until close to 1:00 pm.  When all was said and done I had another endoscopy and a procedure called esophageal dilation. I was put under, and a scope was inserted down my throat for the endoscopy. Once the stricture was confirmed they basically insert a balloon into the area and inflate it to increase the size of the opening. I know that there is a lot more to the procedure, but they were explaining it to me as the cocktail of drugs were being administered and that's about all I can remember before heading off into la la land.  The procedure took close to three hours and as normal the Mayo staff was amazing. 

Now I was not all that worried about the procedure. The folks at the Mayo Clinic have always taken real good care of me so I knew I was safe. The issue is that strictures are like potato chips; you can't have just one. They seem to come in bunches. My sister Mel has had a number of them. The esophageal dilation helps for a while, but if the stricture returns you go back and do the procedure all over again. 

I am tired of hospitals. I am tired of needles and I.V.s. I am tired of not being able to eat what I want. I am tired of trying to find a place to puke after just a few bites of food. Yet, now I just have to wait and see if food starts getting stuck again. I really do not need strictures in my life.

So once again, more exciting time spent at St. Mary's hospital. The good news is that there was no overnight stay needed; I was able to return home the same day. The bad news is that I am back to having to check in with them every few weeks to see if and when the stricture returns.

It is my own, personal, Halloween horror story!

And it all comes down to you

Well, you know that it does

Well, lightning strikes, maybe once, maybe twice

Ah, and it lights up the night

And you see your Gyspsy

(Gypsy  Fleetwood Mac)

A tale of two lunches

“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?""   ~Winnie the Pooh  

This past week I had the opportunity to go out for lunch on two separate occasions. Now normally these are just co-workers getting together for a bite to eat and not anything I would be worried about. However, this is the first time I have gone out to lunch, at work, since I returned from having my stomach removed. In my mind I was running thru how my co-workers react if I got something stuck while eating? More importantly, i was wondering how would I react when something got stuck?

The first opportunity was this past Tuesday and lunch was with a co-worker who is retiring at the end of the month. I ordered what I thought would be a "safe" lunch, but on my second bite I swallowed too quickly and I had a problem. Something got stuck. Then I had to tell my co-worker about it and excused myself. Not the best way to kick off a lunch hour. It took a couple of trips to the bathroom before my body was able to force the item back up, but I was able to get rid of it and then lunch continued.

The other lunch outing was on Wednesday to celebrate a couple of birthday's in the office. Nine of us headed out that day and I have to say that I was more nervous for this outing than I was for lunch on the day before. Yet, everyone was great. They asked me questions about what I could eat and what I couldn't. A few made suggestions and lunch went smoothly. Nothing got stuck. We laughed, joked and in the end had a great time.

What was different?  I don't know.

I guess that this is just how it is going to be from now on. You do not know what is going to get stuck and whats not. You may eat the same food one day and it is fine, but the next day gets stuck. What was different? Were you laughing or talking too much? There is no way to tell. I could hide from from putting myself in these situations by not going to lunch. Yet, life is too short to skip these moments. I enjoy spending this time with my co-workers, and I like food, so shying away from these events because something "might" get stuck doesn't work for me.

I am told it gets better as you go along. I hope so.

My weight has been remaining constant. I have only lost two pounds since I returned to work on September 30th. I will call that a win since I lost the two pounds on my first day back. I might gain or loose a pound here or there, however I have leveled out and seem to be holding at this weight.

Now if I could just get this eating thing down....

Worlds are turning and we're just hanging on
Facing our fear and standing out there alone
A yearning, and it's real to me
There must be someone who's feeling for me
(Higher Love  Steve Winwood)

Food

Eating enough food still seems to be my biggest daily struggle. If I don't eat enough I find myself running out of energy at different points in time during the day. From what I understand, this is my body's way of telling me to eat.  So I do my best to oblige and stuff my face with something.

Over this past week I had been able to keep my weight pretty constant. I had one day where I gained two pounds, but gave it back over the next few days. So at the end of the week I ended up weighing the same as I did on Monday.  My weight did fluctuate a lot during the week. Yet in the end I held my ground.

The challenge is that food gets stuck daily and I am left to deal with it. I get up and walk around to see if I can get it moving, or I can wait to see if my body decides to send it back up. In some cases this can be a matter of minutes, or in extreme cases a few hours. When it happens depends on where and when I eat.  It happens at work and at home, it happens in the morning or as I recently found out just before I go to bed. Anytime it happens, it hurts.
Most of the time these episodes are self inflicted. the problem is that I am eating to fast, or not taking the time to chew my food enough. Yet there are foods that no matter what are a problem. One of the more frustrating foods I am struggling with are egg noodles. They seem to be in a lot of dishes and no matter how well I chew them up, they get stuck.

One thing that does help is that the folks at work love to snack. There are homemade or store bought snacks out daily and you can really just kind of graze your way around the office. I have been able to enjoy some of them with coworkers, however I just need to be really careful on what I decide to eat.
For instance the other day I ate some M&Ms. Both the plain and peanut kind; one fun sized bag of each. Not at the same time or even close to the same time. I thought what the heck, it can't be that bad. I mean, there are what 6 M&Ms in each bag.
Well, the peanut M&Ms went fine. The are mostly peanuts so my intestines were able to deal with them. The plain M&Ms were a completely different story. All chocolate and sugar to which my body said no thank you and sent them back. Not a fun situation at work.

Other that that things are going well. The doctors want me to stay hydrated, and I have been able to do that. I keep a water bottle with me at all times. I have had opportunities to increase my liquid intake from time to time this week. I added a couple of beers, a glass of wine or a small Long Island just to top the day off.  I think I have the drinking part down pat.

And it's up too slow, down to fast
When will I be done
And each hill's higher than the last
On this roller coaster run
(Roller Coaster Run.   Michael Johnson)

Back at it.

Well I managed my first few days back at work and here are my observations.

1. The world doesn't stop when you need to get off it for a short time. It went on just fine without me. Sometimes you may wish that it would just pause and let you catch your breath, but it doesn't. The industry I work in just kept chugging along, the company adapted and adjusted to our customers needs. Things changed, progress was made while I was out and now I am left playing catch up.
It is an odd feeling to say the least. Almost like starting a new job. 

2. Sitting in the break room and getting food stuck is an awkward feeling. That happened to me on my first day back. I sat there hoping that it would pass, but it didn't. I kept looking around at the other folks in break room wondering if they knew what was happening or not? Everyone is happy that I am back and concerned for me. How do I walk out to take care of it with out raising an alarm?
I find myself now trying to time my lunch at times when there is no one in the break room.

3. Even a mild case of dumping at work or on the drive home sucks. Enough said on that one.

In the end I lost 2 pounds on my first day back. The food getting stuck and the dumping incident both happened on that day. I lost another 1/2 pound on Thursday. I have to get this under control, so I was shoving food into my face all day Friday and managed to add back one of the pounds I lost. Give some, take some.

Today started with having to give myself a B-12 shot. First time I did it. I made Edie do it last month.  United Health Care is still refusing to pay for them, but thanks to Walgreens I can get the shots for under $4.00 a shot. The same thing Target wants to charge me $18 for. I can afford the $4.00.

All in all it was great to get back to work. The trials and challenges continue, so you Just pick yourself up and keep going. Things will work out in the end.

When things look low you've gotta keep strong
 Feet to the grass, you've gotta walk it off
 The bows been tied too tight to laugh
 Feet to the ground, you've gotta walk it off
(Red Light  Jonny Lang)